“If you abide in Me, and My words abide in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you.” John 15:7. This are Jesus’ words Himself. All through the years of my ‘service’ for the Lord (since 1990), there had been ups and downs. And the up moments are those I am fully doing worship ministry works – planning, leading, facilitating, teaching, singing, mentoring, etc. One big ‘up’ was facilitating Don Moen with Leann Albrecht and team to come to our city and there was praise and worship amidst the hullabaloo of insurgency in the island (Apr 2008). That was great!
Now, I feel like on the bench. Sometimes, I feel uneasy and tired and bored for not doing the active things like I used to do. Sometimes I ask the Lord, is it the end of my ministry? I reckoned God would never take back what He has given. Amen!
Not once but twice in the past, I felt the Lord asking me,”Do you love me more than these?” In those times, I considered the question so well and I say, “Yes, Lord.” And twice the ministry was taken from me. And it hurt. Now is the third time. Not totally off the ministry but the usual things. Woow, was I just being emotional when I say, Yes, Lord, I love You more than this.”?
I would choose to believe I just passed the pruning stage as in the vine branch. Today, I realize the Lord may just want me to Abide in Him. I praise the Lord I found worshiptraning.com and this women in worship leadership group. You brought me back in focus. At this point I love to sing “I rather have Jesus than anything this world affords today”.
Betsy, I’ve felt the way you feel a million times…. in fact, the whole roller coaster may be beginning again for me…
I’d love to share back-and-forth if you’re still part of this group.
Hi Linda, yes, I’m still part of the group. I love to hear your stories and testimonies for they truly encourage me. Real thanks.